Bad news...
Got a call last night from the OBGyn that my wife's blood test had some abnormalities. This was not a big deal since the same thing happened last time. The concern was supposed to be spina bifida. So, after going to work for a little bit (I was out the door at 6:15, a little early for me), I met the wife at the doc's for an ultrasound. We were told there'd be a 1 in 200 chance so we were fairly optimistic, yet concerned...
So, the bottom line is that we had a miscarriage. The abnormality was from that. We were at about 17 weeks and the baby wasn't alive anymore. This is the third time it's happened - once before our 4 year old and about a year ago - but this was the furthest along we had achieved...and we foolishly felt pretty good about our chances...
Not sure what'll happen next, but we go back tomorrow to get some drug that will help with the procedure on Friday that takes care of everything. Don't need to get into more depth, but you can understand the mood at our house. Any ideas on what to tell the 4 year old? My wife is taking it pretty hard since she'd had to take meds and have many bloodtests in order to get this far...
Thanks for listening and all the support.
NJ
posted by Nicotine Jones @ 2/01/2006 12:31:00 PM
5 comments
5 Comments:
Nick, I can't imagine what you and your family are going through, I feel so bad for you guys. I wish I knew of a way to break it to your daughter, but words fail me at the moment. One option is that you could tell her exactly what happened, or at least a portion of it.
Again, my sympathies go out to you and yours. Anything I can do, let me know.
Thanks, T. When I picked her up from daycare, I talked to the people there to find out what they suggested...it was pretty close to what I decided to do. The child had already told everyone at daycare about how she was going to be a big sister...so I told her that we weren't going to have this baby, we were very sad, but we knew what a great big sister she would be and we would try to have another baby later. She was sad and then her little attention span turned to getting some pink and purple flowers for Mommy. It was one of the hardest things I've ever had to tell anyone - and it phased her very little...More to come, probably...Thanks for the note...
Thanks K. Figure if/when we try again, we'll wait until the kid's 3rd birthday before we tell anyone that we're pregnant...Fewer heartaches, maybe. Sorry, bad humor.
Really appreciate the note. We'll talk soon.
NJ
NJ, I'm so sorry to hear this! My prayers go out to you guys...
I agree with Tara. Maybe being as straightforward as possible is the best thing for your daughter. I'm sure she has already realized that something is different. Kids seem pretty perceptive that way. But I'm sure lots of love and support will definitely be a good thing for her right now (as well as you guys). *hugs*
So take it easy and we'll be here for you when you need us.
NG:
Thanks for the comment...tough times, but we'll get through. The child seems to be handling things best, probably because she knows the least...
But things will improve...
Thanks again.
Post a Comment
<< Home